It looks like I am going to be moving on soon as my husband and I are planning to divorce. I’m trying to see how to get through it with a minimum of damage to myself and my soon to be ex. He doesn’t listen to anything I say anymore, and it is depressing. Do you have any tips on how to keep our focus and get through this even though it is so hard to communicate?

Terry Says:  I’ll leave this to Michele to answer because she is truly the communications expert.  But the one thing I will point out is that the first thing the lawyers always say is “don’t talk to your spouse; let ME (attorney) do all the talking.”   And that’s where the trouble starts.  So if you can at least settle the financial issues between yourselves, and how you will handle custody, come to some basic agreement, it might avoid a very long fight.  You don’t have to sign anything, of course, and your lawyer might point out that you deserve more (or tell him he should pay less!) — but at least you have the basis for a deal.

It looks like I am going to be moving on soon as my husband and I are planning to divorce. I’m trying to see how to get through it with a minimum of damage to myself and my soon to be ex. He doesn’t listen to anything I say anymore, and it is depressing. Do you have any tips on how to keep our focus and get through this even though it is so hard to communicate?

Terry Says:  I’ll leave this to Michele to answer because she is truly the communications expert.  But the one thing I will point out is that the first thing the lawyers always say is “don’t talk to your spouse; let ME (attorney) do all the talking.”   And that’s where the trouble starts.  So if you can at least settle the financial issues between yourselves, and how you will handle custody, come to some basic agreement, it might avoid a very long fight.  You don’t have to sign anything, of course, and your lawyer might point out that you deserve more (or tell him he should pay less!) — but at least you have the basis for a deal.

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